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The hugo mendes show

The title card of The Hugo Mendes Show

The Hugo Mendes Show is a television talk show, aired on Kaboom 1 every Sunday at 21:00. It is hosted by Hugo Mendes, who interviews invited guests, as well as analysing the weeks events, including political and showbiz news.

The show is produced by Clarity Studios, and filmed in front of a live audience at the company's news studio in King's Gardens, Noble City.

Production[]

Conception[]

The idea for the show was conceived in late 2010, after Mendes left the regional channel he used to host a similar show on. Several producers from Kaboom TV had seen his work, and were interested in bringing a similar show to Kaboom.

Mendes agreed a contract with the company in December 2012, and several test episodes were aired on Kaboom 4 throughout early 2013. After the show was successful on Kaboom 4, it was moved to the main Saturday night slot on Kaboom 1.

The Hugo Mendes Show began its time on Kaboom 1 in September 2013, with a special edition episode starring King Sebastian.

Filming[]

The Hugo Mendes Show is currently produced by Clarity Studios, at their studio in Noble City. All episodes are filmed in front of a live audience, who are often very noisy.

All tickets to watch the show being taped are free, although those wishing to get tickets must apply for them via the show's website.

Each episode is typically taped on the Wednesday before it is aired, although there have been some exceptions.

Format[]

The majority of shows feature Mendes interviewing one or two guests per episode, as well as musical performances and comedy and satire from Mendes. One notable exception to this are the special editions of the show, which typically feature one important guest whose interview lasts the whole show.

Mendes likes each episode to have a few surprises, and be different from the previous episode, as such past episodes have featured cooking demonstrations, mini competitions and quizzes.

Episodes[]

Saturday 1st September- King Sebastian[]

This episode was taped in front of a live audience in Noble City, which included politician Justin Abrahams.

Broadcast on Saturday 1st September at 9pm on Kaboom 1

Mr. Mendes- Good evening Noble City, and welcome to The Hugo Mendes Show! Oh, and what a show we have in store for you tonight, as we meet with none other than King Sebastian himself! So, without further ado, may I present His Majesty King Sebastian!

(Sebastian enters to a musical accompaniment by the band)

Sebastian- Hello Mr. Mendes! How are you doing today?

Mr. Mendes- Very well thank you! How are you?

Sebastian- Excellent! My wife and I are expecting our second child in a few months and I just gave another speech. Also, being a King is an excellent job and I am greatly enjoying it. You wanted to ask me some questions, I understand?

Mr. Mendes- I most certainly do! Congratulations to you and your wife, by the way, you must be thrilled!

Sebastian- Why thank you! Ask ahead, my good man, I'm all ears!

Mr. Mendes- I understand you had a somewhat difficult childhood, with your father being killed in a tragic accident and your mother suffering from depression. What was your childhood like?

Sebastian- My childhood was indeed a bit difficult, though my mother did an excellent job raising me. In my father's absence, I came to regard my great-uncle Arthur as a bit of a father figure. He took me under his wing and showed me the ropes of how to be a king, so to speak. I believe he even initially intended me to be his heir, rather then Dimitri. His stories and experiences have been instrumental in forming my idea on what a King should be like, and I regard him as an example still. You can say my childhood was, for the most part, happy.

Mr. Mendes- Very interesting! And do you have a good relationship with Dimitri now, despite what has happened between you?

Sebastian- My cousin and I never got along very well. We were once rather close as we all visited the old King Arthur often, but there was always a bit of rivalry between the two of us. Our personalities are very different, we have a different set or morals and viewpoints and often clashed. In later years we have grown closer and marriage mellowed him down, but I never forgave him for his attitude in the Civil War where he cowardly hid as I fought for my country.

Mr. Mendes- It's good to hear your side of the story, Sebastian! Now for some questions about your daughter, Alice

Sebastian- Most certainly!

Mr. Mendes- In many royal households, much of the parenting is left to an army of nannies and governesses. Is this something that goes on in your household, or are you and your wife very hands on parents?

Sebastian- I try to be a hands on parent, yes, but to my shame I have to admit my wife is more involved in raising her then I am. We do have housekeepers to do our household chores though, and I rarely changed a diaper. I'm furthermore unable to cook without burning down the house, but I often read my daughter stories at night, and stimulate her natural curiosity. Fatherhood is the greatest joy of my life and we intend to raise a large family.

Mr. Mendes- Certainly! As I have a daughter of my own, I agree with that! Alice is approaching school age, do you plan to educate her in the palace or will you be sending her to a mainstream school?

Sebastian- I believe it to be of vital importance to send her into a mainstream school no matter what. To raise a child too sheltered has a negative influence on her development in social aspects, I fear. We are undecided on the school, however I have a firm trust in the Lovian educational system.

Mr. Mendes- Yes, I've heard there are some good schools in your area of Noble City! Now, may I ask some more serious questions?

Sebastian- You may! I'm all ears!

Mr. Mendes- You've said many times that you will be a more active King than Prince Dimitri was? So, my question to you, how will you go about engaging with the "modern Lovian"?

Sebastian- The modern Lovian will not be much of a problem for me, as I am myself a fine example of the modern Lovian. I was born in the late 1980s and I am as modern as they come. I believe it to be important to take the people seriously and talk to them plainly, and eye to eye. In my latest speech you may have noticed I appeal to the people's natural sense of responsibility. This I believe to be of vital importance.

Mr. Mendes- Of course!

Sebastian- Citizens, in my view, wish to be taken seriously. Under Dimitri they were not listened to, their questions went unanswered. I wish to make myself more available. I live to serve, and see myself as a public servant

Mr. Mendes- And will you be holding frequent meetings with Prime Minister Ilava and other senior members of government?

Sebastian- I am a close friend of Mr. Ilava and a firm supporter of his Oceana cause. I believe in the preservation of traditional languages, customs and traditions and have often worked towards protecting these values. Therefore me and Ilava get along famously. I am also close to the Baron of Donia and to that splendid Japanese fellow of the Green Party whose name escapes me. With these people I get along well. Every Sunday after church, I have a habit of sharing a cold beer with the Prime Minister either at his family place or at mine. There we talk of state affairs as well as our family lives. He gives me advice sometimes as he is a father to seven children.

Mr. Mendes- It's great to see that you and Mr Ilava share a personal connection as well as a professional one! One of the issues most important to the Lovian electorate is devolution, and many politicians from across the spectrum have supported the formation of state councils. Where do you stand on this issue?

Sebastian- I believe it is very important to allow states their own freedom of choice in several important matters. To relay responsibility down to state level and grant states such freedom I think is something we should consider. State councils would be, in my mind, a good first step towards more stately autonomy. Especially in Oceana this is of great importance.

Mr. Mendes- It's very good that you have a strong love for the people and culture of Oceana, but do you find that this often stops you from relating with Lovians from other states?

Sebastian- It does not, as I was born and raised in the state of Sylvania myself. Therefore my loyalty lies with Sylvania just as much as it does with Oceana and any other state for that matter. For example, I speak several local dialects and languages of other states including Bredish.

Mr. Mendes- Do you have anything to say in Bredish for our Clymeni viewers?

Sebastian- I'd tell them to remember: "Alle man sin boaren vry an elyk in digniti-aguz-rexts", they'll know what it means!

Mr. Mendes- Very good Your Majesty! I myself cannot speak Bredish, but I admire your willingness to learn

Sebastian- It means we are all equal, and brothers and sisters! I believe we should all live in such a spirit of brotherhood, as Lovians.

Mr. Mendes- Now for a question regarding gay rights, another issue that is important to many voters!

Sebastian- Most certainly! Ask me!

Mr. Mendes- One of your close friends, Ygo August Donia, has been known for making homophobic remarks on occasion. Where do you stand on gay rights, and do you believe that as King it is your duty to encourage equality and tolerance?

Sebastian- I am actually a big supporter of the rights of gay people to be who they wish to be, and believe this to be a vital right of all Lovians. I do however also defend the right of religious people or conservatives to hold different ideas. Ilava and Donia, as Christians, may feel differently about homosexuality then I do. But as long as we all treat each other with dignity and respect, in spite of our individual differences, I believe we can all get along in this nation without much trouble.

Mr. Mendes- So you would say that you can relate to people both for and against gay rights?

Sebastian- I could, yes. In as much that, I myself may support gay rights but I will support the right of those against it to continue to voice their opinion whenever they please, as long as they do so in a respectful manner.

Mr. Mendes- So! Now that we've got all the serious political stuff out the way, it's time for my favourite segment of the show!

Sebastian- Sounds fun!

Mr. Mendes- Thanks to the rise of social media, hundreds of Lovians have tweeted us questions that they wish for me to ask you, and I will now ask you the three best questions

Sebastian- Shoot, Lovia! Give me your best!

Mr. Mendes- Now, this question comes from Annabel from Sofasi, Clymene- Does His Majesty have a royal stylist, or do you choose your clothes yourself?

Sebastian- My cousin Alexander is a very stylish young man and he helps me pick out clothes sometimes. Other then that, you can pretty much say my wife's my personal sylist. She is one helluva classy woman, Annabel! If you ever need a fashion tip, just give our Queen a call.

Mr. Mendes- Well I agree with you there!

Sebastian- Good to hear Hugo!

Mr. Mendes- Our second question is coming from Louis from Charleston, Sylvania- Do you like the Royal Palace as it is, or will you be undertaking some home improvement projects?

Sebastian- I like the Royal Palace the way it is now, Louis! But as I believe in modest living, the wife and I consider opening a part of the Palace to the public. We believe the Royal Palace is, in a way, public property and should be open to all Lovians. Tourists might be interested in seeing the old study room of my great-uncle for example, or his old hunting trophies from Africa. The palace is in marvelous shape and you yourself will be more then welcome to drop by in some months, Louis!

Mr. Mendes- Well, I know I can speak for many Lovians when I say that the palace would make a great tourist attraction!

Sebastian- I thought so too, and what's mine is yours my friends!

Mr. Mendes- Unfortunately, it is now time for our final question from the public.

Sebastian- Oh, how sad Well, let me hear it! Time flies when having fun, Hugo!

Mr. Mendes- This question is coming from Claire in Beaverwick, Kings- So Sebastian, will you be undertaking any royal trips abroad to promote the culture of Lovia?

Sebastian- That's a marvelous queston Claire! And yes, I will. In the spirit of the great Arthur III, I will travel the world and promote Lovian culture. My brother Joseph and cousin Alexander already frequently do so, albeit it with mixed results on wild Alex' part. I myself love spending time in Brunant and am a good friend of their royals. My sister is engaged to be married to their prince Karl, and will wed later this year. I will soon go there again.

Mr. Mendes- Well, congratulations to her then! Now, unfortunately it is time to say goodbye to Sebastian, dearest viewers. But first, to play us out- The Hugo Mendes Band!

(The band plays theme tune)

Sebastian- Goodbye, Hugo, goodbye dear viewers! You were wonderful!

(Sebastian watches band and claps enthusiastically, end credits begin to roll)

Saturday 7th September- Prince Dimitri[]

The show was taped on Thursday 5th September in Noble City, and was broadcast on Friday 6th September at 9pm on Kaboom 1

Mr. Mendes- Good evening Noble City! This is Hugo Mendes, and I'd like to welcome you to tonight's show. I'll be chatting to Prince Dimitri, as he shares his side of the story regarding the recent events within the royal family. So without further ado, may I represent Prince Dimitri.

(Dimitri enters the stage to a musical accompaniment by the band)

Mr. Mendes- Good evening Dimitri! How are you?

Dimitri- I have had better days, Hugo. Sleepless night this situation has given me.

(Dimitri touches his forehead)

Mr. Mendes- So now that you have left the Royal Palace, where do you live?

Dimitri- I live with my wife's brother and his boyfriend. It is not an ideal situation... we have little space to ourselves and no privacy. My brother Alexander offered me to crash at his place but I refused, I want to stay clear of his wild partying ways. I have surprisingly little options. Friends I used to hold dear to me abandoned me. Now I am no longer King I feel how lonely I have been all these years. Now it is just me and my wife. But we get by.

(An audience member interrupts, shouting "WE WANT DIMITRI BACK!")

(The audience member is promptly removed by security personnel)

Mr. Mendes- Sorry about that folks! Let us continue proceedings!

Dimitri (To audience member)- Oh my dear fool! You speaks these words so lightly!

Mr. Mendes- Anyway, Dimitri

Dimitri- Yes, let us

Mr. Mendes- Do you get on well with Alexander and his boyfriend?

Dimitri- Alexander does not have a boyfriend Hugo! My wife's brother does. My own brother's a lady's man through and through.

Mr. Mendes- Apologies, I misunderstood

Dimitri- He is a man of loose contacts, married to his bottle and guitar so I do not see much of the boy. No offense taken, I could have expressed myself better.

Mr. Mendes- Now for the big question, the one that we, the Lovian public want you to answer

Dimitri- I am prepared to answer every question I need to make the truth be known.

Mr. Mendes- You may have seen my interview last week with Sebastian. What were your first impressions?

Dimitri- That he is a liar! And that he does not understand the gravity of his lies, nor their impact. He blabbers on and on, he speaks much but thinks little. He's always wanted to be King just for the prestige of it. He knows nothing of sacrifice. I gave my entire life and youth for this nation. And just because he killed people in an absurd war, he feels he is more of a man then me? He has belittled me ever since I was a boy... and even after I give him what he wants most, he belittles me.

Mr. Mendes- And how would you defend the stance you took during the devastating Civil War?

Dimitri- All he did there was smirk, smile, laugh at his own amazingness and rub more salt in the wound he himself gave me with a smile as wide as Peace Island! I can defend it by saying I did what was best for my nation. What use is a dead or wounded king? And I have no military experience. I abhor weapons and hunting, and the sight of blood disgusts and startles me. Am I less a man for it, just because my nature is softer then his?

Mr. Mendes- That certainly doesn't make you any less of a man, Dimitri! You may have also heard in our nation's press about how Sebastian describes his relationship with you. How do you react to that?

Dimitri- He was right, in a way. We never liked each other. But when he said Arthur liked him best, he was lying. That was never the case. Arthur was a scholar, as am I. He was an intellectual. Sure he had his fair share of adventures but he was a scholar first and foremost, not a soldier. When I saw him tell these lies with a straight face I had a hard time controlling myself. I felt the strong urge to change channels to not have to see this slander, but my wife convinced me to stay tuned and record it. I am now grateful for that.

Mr. Mendes- A good answer! And a good metaphor! On my show we like a man who can use a good metaphor. And now I will follow by using a metaphor of my own in our next question. The fracture that you and Sebastian created in Lovia’s royal family, do you plan to let it heal or make the metaphorical fracture even wider?

Dimitri- I had intended to not dignify his lies with a response, but I find myself unable to let it slide. I have let too much slide over the course of these years. This man is a shame to the family. Now he has plotted against me, schemed against me, and set up my own relatives against me. My own flesh and blood! I can never let this heal... the wounds go too deep. He has insulted my pride, ruined my life. Sebastian has struck my heart with a icecold blade. Hacking away at my reputation, step by step. I believe him to have orchestrated the October coup too, behind the scenes. He is very close with the Donia Clan after all.

Mr. Mendes- And what is your view of the Donia Clan?

Dimitri- They are treacherous rats, all of them! They have no morals, they have no compassion, no honour. They are not true Lovians. Communists in name only, capitalists in everything else. Fake Christians masquerading behind a carefully cultivated image of piousness. Fake as plastic, and when they burn they smell just as bad. They are worth less then the dirt under a true Noble's shoes.

Mr. Mendes- Having seen a Donia infriltrate the Brunanter royal family, do you fear the same will happen to the Lovian royal family?

Dimitri- I sometimes did, yes. I was afraid for a while Dalia Muhammed, the widow of the previous Baron and the mother of Ygo, would make her daughter seduce Sebastian or one of the Bradly-Lashawns and use them as her pawns. They also did the same with Donia's former rival Pierlot McCrooke you see. Then it came to my ears, Dalia Donia's expecting her third child. So she unlikely to wiggle her way into our family now. And even Sebastian won't sink low enough to leave his pregnant wife for her. When McCrooke did that, it cost him dearly in the public opinion. Sebastian is too smart to make such a mistake. The Bradly-Lashawns and the Donia's are... dangerously close however. I watch their every move carefully, I have my people on their backs. But there is little I can do. They are too close for my taste. You may call me paranoid but these are real threats to Lovia I speak of. One day people will see I am right. I hope it won't be too late.

Mr. Mendes- What do you think the future has in store for Lovia? And how is the Lovia of today different from the one you inherited six years ago?

Dimitri- The future is grim, very grim. There's a dim light shining through the vast darkness surrounding us. A small, dim light at best to enlighten us. Lovia as I see it is corrupt. It has been morally corrupted. Education is not what it used to be, The religious have gotten too much freedom, their numbers have grown and the numbers of atheist have shrunk. That is the main difference between the Lovia I once inherited... the Lovia I was born in was a Lovia dominated by atheism and freethinking. The CCPL, the Donia's, Ilava and the rise of conservatism and fascism have not gone unnoticed. The nation I fell in love with changed forever. I do not recognize it anymore. The events of the last few years have made me a bitter and cynical man. Maybe I should not have children, to prevent them the pain I have to endure every day of living in these cursed lands.

(Dimitri touches his forehead with his palms in a dramatic gesture, looks straight into the camera)

Dimitri- A cursed land, I tell you! And here I walk a lonely and cursed man. I foresee dark times coming for us. Now for the first time ever, I fully understand how my dear uncle Lucas must have felt.

Mr. Mendes- As a freethough athiest, your ideology clashes with that of the Prime Minister. How did you and Mr Ilava work together in your final days as King, and how did you overcome your differences?

Dimitri- We didn't. I simply never spoke to that man. He is a nice enough guy but I lost all interest in politics. They made it impossible for me. They, the cabal theorists, McCrooke, Donia, La Blaca, Koshkov... the war, the war! How could I be in politics? I could do nothing! They made it impossible. They did it. The cabal theorists. Their slander...

(Dimitri turns red and becomes upset, before quickly regaining himself)

Dimitri- You may think I am crazy. Maybe I am. I was too young, Hugo, I was just too young to be King. Arthur was wrong. They were all wrong. It should not have been me, nor Sebastian. It should have been Philip. I was too young... I cannot do this. I'm an emotional wreck now. You cannot make a boy King, at such an age. I should have played, I should have laughed, I should have been a child, a student. But they never let me. Yes... yes that is a good idea. They took my childhood from me Hugo! They took everything from me.

'Mr. Mendes- You have time Dimitri, you have a long life ahead of you!

(Hugo turns to audience)

Mr. Mendes- Okay, we'll go to commercial now!

(The commercial break begins, as Hugo begins to comfort Dimitri)

(The commercial break ends)

Mr. Mendes- Welcome back to the Hugo Mendes Show! Tonight we're talking to Prince Dimitri, as he tells his side of the story. Dimitri, why don't you and your wife take a nice long holiday! You deserve a rest

Dimitri- I need a vacation, yes. Far away. From this cursed land.

Mr. Mendes- See the world! Live while you're young! Enjoy the freedom!

Dimitri- I will try. There's a time for everything. I need my time. I have some unresolved issues. For now I will stick around Lovia. These following days and weeks may become very interesting. Thank you for your concern. I hope I answered your questions well.

Mr. Mendes- Unfortunately it is now time for the final segment of our show!

Dimitri- Sure! I'm ready for it

Mr. Mendes- Dimitri, are you prepared to take some questions from the Lovian public?

Dimitri- Yes, I am.

Mr. Mendes- Our first question comes from Jane in Kinley, Seven- What do you plan to make of your life now Dimitri? Is there a career path you would like to follow?

Dimitri- I want to focus on my studies, reading, writing. Me and my wife wish to be left to ourselves, and we consider traveling the world. We have always been fascinated by South America. A nice retreat on the Copacabana perhaps. We need our rest after all this. Thank you for your question Jane!

Mr. Mendes- Ah, I've always been fascinated by that continent myself! Perhaps you could take Spanish lessons? Now, our final question....

Dimitri- I already took some, senor! Marvelous idea. Certainly, ask me.

(Dimitri pronounces "senor" wrong)

Mr. Mendes- Now time for a question from Dan, in Hurbanova, Oceana- Do you feel that you will ever forgive Sebastian?

Dimitri- In this answer I can short: no. The wounds are too deep, the damage cannot be undone. What's done is done.

Mr. Mendes- And now, dear viewers, dear Dimitri, it is time to bid farewell until next time.... But before we go, the Hugo Mendes Band will play a song of Dimitri's choosing!!! Dimitri- The Ode to Joy always soothes my spirit whenever I am down...

Mr. Mendes- Excellent! Ode to Joy it is then...

(Hugo turns to the audience)

Mr. Mendes- Good night Lovia! This has been Hugo Mendes and goodbye for now!

(End credits roll, as Dimitri and Hugo clap the band)

Saturday 14th September- Lovian Music Special[]

In this edition of the show, Hugo spoke to two Lovian bands, from two very different genres of Lovian music. After starting the show with a review of the week's political and cultural events, Hugo spoke to the members of Car Crash Sex, a Lovian punk band. They spoke about the release of their recent album, Teenage Lobotomy and gave an insight into life on the road.

After the commercial break, Hugo interviewed a traditional Oceana folk band. They also gave an insight into their musical careers, and gave their opinion on the recent events in Oceana politics. The show finished with performances from each band, as well as a mash-up of Oceana folk music and punk rock.

Saturday 21st September- Giselle Shea, Marty and Ellen Elsen[]

In this episode, Hugo again opened the show with a review of the week's political and cultural events, before speaking to Giselle Shea, heiress to the Veloz Group. Giselle spoke about her new role on Brunanter reality television programme, Posh... And Full of It. However, Giselle managed to artfully dodge Hugo's questions about her reported relationship with Prince Alexander.

In the second segment of the episode, Hugo spoke to husband and wife television production team, Marty and Ellen Elsen. They chatted to Hugo about the new season of their comedy show, 35,000 Feet, and announced that they would soon be releasing a documentary about the royal family.

Notable guests[]

See also[]

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