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Goatmilk

Campaign poster by Oos Wes Ilava

Milk is good for everyone is the name of a Lovian privately-organized health campaign in the media, invented by August Magnus Donia. The slogan is based on its Dutch equivalent: "Melk is goed voor elk." The campaign wishes to promote the use of milk, to give more strength to Lovian children. Lars Washington and Oos Wes Ilava are also involved in the campaign, which turned out to be an instant success. Congress though, chose not to support the campaign - as proposed by Donia, and so the campaign remains a private one.

Idea Edit

According to Magnus: "At the age of 10, I started drinking 1 liter milk a day and enjoying many dairy products such as cheese and yoghurt. It made my bones strong like rocks - I never broke anything, even though I fell quite a few times! I am strong like a bear despite of my age. I could fight ten wrestlers at once and never would I be tire. All because of my daily portion of milk! It is the oil to my motor!"

Another fact, according to Magnus: "Milk will stimulate your fertility, it also makes you more intelligent. The milk from a water buffalo for example, contains kJ 463/100 grams of energy! But then again, water buffalo is not the kind of life stock we find in Lovia. Therefore we are most happy to have our famous goat's milk, which contains only kJ 253/100 grams."

Background Edit

Milkprotest

A veganist protest against milk consumption.

Prior to the set up of the Milk is good for everyone campaign, Lovians were very low ranking on the international scale of milk consumption. There are many reasons for this. Compared to other countries, Lovia has a large number of veganists, who refuse to consume animal products, such as milk. Another reason is that, especially in Oceana and Seven and with younger generations, milk is considered "uncool". A well-known East Hills saying is The cow's for leather 'n' cheese, the sheep's for wool; while the both make meat, just the goat's for livin' on the street; referring to the fact that goat meat is impopular and milk is not even worth mentioning. Also the use of growth hormones has been a discouraging factor for a lot of people.

Dairy products other than milk are not very popular in Lovia. In cooking, butter is very often replaced with oil for health reasons. Cream is unpopular because it is fattening. Also pudding is not consumed much as it is very scarce and only few shops sell it. However, there is one exception to the rule: cheese. Because of Lovia's history, cheese, which is a typically Dutch thing, is consumed above average, although still not as much as in the Netherlands or Belgium themself.

Production, consumption and tradeEdit

139,000 tonnes of milk were produced in the year 2012, which is remarkably high for such a small country. Three main factors are responsible for this:

  • a climate which allows almost all land to be farmed.
  • a low population density, equivalent to that of Sweden, making much more land available for farming.
  • a technologically developed society, allowing milk production to be made extremely efficient.

Lovians consume, on average, about 140 kg of milk per capita per year, which is low compared to many devoloped countries. (The Netherlands, one of the highest countries on the list, consume 320kg, while in the US the figure is 250kg). This makes up less than a quarter of Lovian production, therefore the vast majority of milk is exported, mainly to the US. In this respect, Lovia has been compared to New Zealand, which despite being such a small country is one of the world's largest producers of milk, yet its citizens consume less milk on average than Lovians.

Campaign Edit

MIGFY tour bus

A tour bus.

A number of different persuasive methods were used in the campaign. Statistics show that purchases of milk went up by 15% in the month after Oos Wes Ilava's poster was published. The poster was placed in a number of places, including the famous 'tour buses.'

A number of other initiatives were launched by MIGFE supporters. Donations allowed milk to be served free to children in primary schools, a scheme which was greatly successful. Rudyear-Montpelier announced that they would invest in the development of a recipe for alcoholic milk, and MIGFE authorities at first subsidised the cost of the drink greatly, though this had to stop when they were threatened with legal action for causing public disorder.

Defrayment Edit

Mlekomat

A mlekomat.

Goat milk

Hladovka's Alcoholic Goat's Milk.

The project is mainly financed with gifts and financial support from the government. The placement of mlekomats (IPA: [ˈmɫɛkomac]), vending machines where milk can be bought for a very low price, in Oceana, was mainly financed by the local state government, while the artificially low prices are compensated by the dairy farmers themselves.

Mlekomat Edit

The mlekomat is a machine which dispenses milk, after the customer inserts currency or credit into the machine. After payment, the desired product will be available, as the machine releases it, so that it falls in an open compartment at the bottom, or into a cup put in by the customer. As hot milk is also available from the machine, some products need to be prepared first. The following products are available from the vending machines:

  • Uncle Larry's Goat Milk (cardboard package 330ml) $1.20
  • Uncle Larry's Goat Milk (plastic bottle 500ml) $1.60
  • Uncle Larry's Goat Milk (plastic bottle 1l) $2.20
  • Uncle Larry's Goat Milk (fresh: cup of 200ml, either hot or cool) 90 cents
  • Uncle Larry's Sheep Milk (plastic bottle 500ml) $2.00
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk (cardboard package 330ml) $1.00
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk (cardboard package 500ml) $1.50
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk (plastic bottle 500ml) $1.70
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk (plastic bottle 1l) $2.00
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk (fresh: cup of 200ml, either hot or cool) 80 cents
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk Skimmed (cardboard package 330ml) $1.00
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk Skimmed (plastic bottle 500ml) $1.50
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk Skimmed (plastic bottle 1l) $2.00
  • Hlársvencic Cow's Milk Skimmed (fresh: cup of 200ml, either hot or cool) 90 cents
  • Farmer Ferguse's Horse Milk (plastic bottle 500ml) $2.40
  • Nutricious Milk for Sucklings (plastic bottle 330ml) $3.00
  • Soja Milk (plastic bottle 500ml) $3.00
  • LaktoFree Buttermilk (cardboard package 330ml) $1.50
  • LaktoFree Buttermilk (fresh: cup of 200ml, either hot or cool) $1.10
  • Hladovka's Alcoholic Goat's Milk (bottle 300ml) $4.00

The official slogan of Juraj Hladovka's goat's milk is His eyes shall be red like wine, and his teeth white like milk.

2015 revival Edit

The campaign was revived in 2015 by the prime minister Oos Wes Ilava and previous Prime Minister and political enemy Anna Maria Whithdonck-Malsky. Whithdonck-Malsky stated it was an attempt to 'put aside our political differences and unite to promote this campaign for strong teeth, bones and dairy industry.' Ilava argued that 'the youth needs to drink more alcoholic goat's milk.'

Supporters Edit

The campaign is supported by several health organizations, doctors, the dairy sector, and other prominent Lovians.

Famous Lovians involved in the campaign are Semyon Breyev, August Magnus Donia, Ygo August Donia, Oos Wes Ilava, Lars Washington, and Marcus Villanova.

Joshua Katz also supports the campaign, and has suggested that the Capitol building be painted white, the colour of milk. Also, Jake Mezatir suggested the addition of mlekomats in Clymene.

Goals Edit

  • Because of high rates of calcium in milk, Magnus says, it should have a renewed interest and should be an important part of every Lovian's daily diet. Consuming more milk will also prevent the elderly from breaking hips, legs and back as a result of a nasty fall from stairs.
  • As consuming calcium regularly during growth increases bone-density, it is very healthy and important to growing children and teens under the age of 21. Tablets and pills are no alternative, but could be given to those who suffer from lactose intolerance.

More facts Edit

It is also known for a fact that milk will:

  1. Increase libido
  2. Increase physical strength and growth
  3. Increase IQ
  4. Increase bone density

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